Thursday, May 21, 2015

Qualifications Pt. 7

1 Timothy 3:4-5

Family! How I wish Paul had moved this to the top of his list because I believe that this should be the number one qualification for a pastor, and I believe pastors should understand that the family should be their number one priority. I’ve seen way too many ministers miss this important aspect of their ministry, and when they do, they typically lose both their ministries and their families. Read this carefully: God instituted the family long before He created the church. I believe that as a pastor my calling is to put God first, family second, and the church third in my life. If your church doesn’t understand that, then shame on you! I have seen way too many churches and pastors suffer because they get their priorities messed up.

I will never forget our seminary days. They were tough. Sonya worked full-time and took care of the children. I worked a minimum of 32 hours every week, took a full class load, and helped take care of the children. Not a day went by that I didn’t set aside time to play with Jennifer and Ashley. I have notebooks filled with pages of Greek and Hebrew homework where one of the girls, while sitting in my lap while I was doing the work, tried to draw the same Greek and Hebrew characters they saw on my paper. Please don’t think I’m bragging. I messed up a lot over the years and still cringe when I think about those mistakes. But I’ve always made my family the second highest priority in my life, and I am proud of that.

Paul said that a pastor must rule his house well and that his children must be in submission. Uh, listen up all you dads out there who are not pastors – he says the same thing about you in his letters to the Ephesians and the Colossians. But here is the key. Paul viewed leadership of the family as a proving ground for leadership in the church, and that goes for more than just pastors. Literally, Paul is telling us that pastors must make sure that everything in their homes runs smoothly. Specifically, his young children must be known for their obedience and morally upright behavior. I also believe that when you train up a child in the way he should go, when he is grown he will continue in that same lifestyle. I seem to remember a wise man saying that a long time ago, and I believe it to be true. However, Paul is talking about children living in your home. Adult children make their own choices, and while an argument could be made that if they have gone off into a lifestyle of immorality as adults that something must have been wrong with their upbringing, this was not Paul’s purpose in this admonition. While they are living in the pastor’s home, the pastor’s children must demonstrate the qualities of godly behavior. That doesn’t mean they won’t do the things that all children do, but they should model the behavior they see from their parents.

I do want to point out two things. The word “submission” is a military term referring to soldiers ranked under one in authority. The pastor must take that authority to heart as a father, but he must also temper that authority with the agape love of God. Why? Because the goal isn’t to raise an army that fears you; the goal is to raise a family that knows Jesus. The pastor must demonstrate through his home that he is spiritually gifted in ways that allow him to set the example of how to live and serve and love. If he does this, so, too, will his family. If he doesn’t do this, why would anyone want to follow him in the church?

The second thing I want you to see is that I think Paul wanted pastors to know that they are to relate to their church members not as a master relates to servants but as fathers to their children. Think about that for just a minute or two!

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