Broken and Humbled

Broken and Humbled

I have to admit, that is me. For a week now, I have been a blubbering mess. Yes, I know that is not very manly, but I’ve never been concerned about my masculinity – only my humility. You see, I am a very proud person. Some might say conceited. Some might say arrogant. I am constantly having to go before the Lord and ask His forgiveness and humble myself before Him. That’s what James says, right? Humble yourself so that He may exalt you in due time. I often think of that verse and wonder if it isn’t a little like the man who received a medal for being the most humble man in town, but the day he wore it in public, they took it away from him. I’m joking of course, but too many of us see James’ words as a magic formula. If we want God to lift us up, we must humble ourselves, but if you humble yourself just so that you can be lifted up then you are not really humbling yourself. Wow! It’s kind of like a Catch 22, isn’t it? Well, I digress. Back to the broken and humbled and blubbering stuff.

Most of you – all 7 who read this, I think – are aware that we celebrated our Lucy’s first birthday this week in Pensacola. So many things we did, so many Facebook posts I read reminded me of the horrific roller coaster of emotions we went through the days following Lucy’s birth. I especially cried (in public I might add) when I read my daughter Jennifer’s post about the night after Lucy was born. My first granddaughter, Hayes, had asked what was wrong with Lucy. Jennifer told her, and Hayes said, “God can fix that!” Such faith! And God did fix that. And as I went through these emotions, I wondered to myself, “Why did God look with favor on my family and give us such a wonderful miracle?” So many of these other babies that went through even lesser physical issues than Lucy are not perfectly whole and healthy like she is. By the way, that is not from a grandfather’s bias, either. That is the pronouncement of all the doctors and specialists that have treated her this past year. The doctor and the nurses in the NICU were amazed on Monday at this precious child walking and running and smiling and laughing. The looks on their faces told me that they never believed that would happen. But God showed them, and I am so glad that He did. But why? Was it the thousands of prayers that went up on that fateful day as we stood around her little bed with tears streaming down our faces sending text messages frantically begging our friends to pray because the doctors said there was no hope? Was it because of the simple faith of a child who said, “God can fix that?” Or was it just because God has a plan, and the life of this little girl has already touched thousands and has drawn them to Jesus or has drawn them closer to Him?

Every time I think about that day, I am not filled with pride, conceit, or arrogance. I am broken. And humbled. And so very grateful to my Heavenly Father. And as I sit in my office this morning typing this blog, I am asking God to do it again. Not heal my granddaughter or anyone else’s granddaughter though there are many that I am praying for in that way. I am asking God to heal our church and the churches all over the country. To take us from our cold indifference and light the fires of godly passion in our hearts. To break us and humble us so that He might lift us up once again to be the city on a hill, the light of the world, and the salt of the earth. To take us all through the roller coaster of emotions as we see the hopeless state of our world that takes the horrific murder of a Jordanian pilot and puts it in front of us under the guise of news but that is really meant to “entertain.” The hopeless state of our world when a panel of judges dare shake their fists in the face of Holy God and declare His law to be unconstitutional. The hopeless state of our world that protects the lives of unborn animals and birds but allows unborn human babies to be murdered all in the name of choice. To take us through these roller coaster of emotions not to overwhelm us at how bad things are but to recognize with the faith of a child: God can fix that! But only God can fix that. And it will only be fixed when Christians are broken and humbled and awakened to the truth that salvation is only in the name of Jesus!